Titus 2: 3-5

I have a new job. I am a stay at home, full time wife and moma! Wow! I love my new title.

I have been at home with my boys for 4 years (Maximus is 8 and River is 4), but I haven't been devoted to them since I was also devoted to my job, working from home. I am so grateful for those years, the opportunity to be able to make an income, raise and teach my boys at home and the many lessons we learned together. It was, some days, truly the best of both worlds.
Hindsight, I wouldn't trade them for anything.

When I had Maximus, my mom switched shifts and we rotated keeping him. Looking back, I don't know how we did it. Those were some stressful years on all of us, but I don't think either of us would do it differently if we had to do it over again.

When River was born, it was time everyone lived normal and I wanted to stay at home with my babies. Since Maximus was only 4, at the time, I kept him at home too (before I knew homeschool was in our vocabulary). I wanted to spend my days with them. I, nervously, unsure, quit my job. But a few days later, my boss called and asked if I wanted to work from home. What?! HALLELUJAH! YES!!! And so with dial-up Internet, a brand new baby, and a mischevious 4 year old, I took on the responsibility. Needless, to say it was a looong, hard 4 years. And it got harder each day. My boys started getting older and wanted more of my attention, and the job became more demanding as the company grew. But I knew it was what I had to do.

I kept hearing God tell me to close the doors. And I kept saying back, 'God, you can't be talking to me, we don't make ends meet with two incomes, how would we do it with one?' And He'd reply, 'you'll find a way.' I would say 'But, God being able to be at home and make money too, it's a once in a lifetime opportunity, I have to make it work', and He'd say, 'I have other plans for you, ones with richer opportunities'.
I would tell Jason about my conversations with God and that He is calling me to stay home, and he'd say "I think you are hearing things".

So in my own world, one that I controlled, Maximus drew a picture for me and as most moms would say "awww sweetie thank you, that is so sweet", I burst out in tears. It was a picture of me working downstairs with him and River playing together, alone, upstairs.
He had no idea why I was crying. He took the picture back and colored some flowers on my "desk". This is not what a moma was supposed to look like, this is not how I wanted him to remember his childhood. SO to "fix" things, I moved my office upstairs! There. That should make it better. Um, not so much. My convictions of staying at home were becoming so strong it was taking over and I was starting to fear not listening to God.

A fellow homeschool mom brought a magazine called Above Rubies, to our group to give away.
I took it home and dropped to my knees when I came to an article called "I have God's permission", and in it, it quoted Titus 2: 3-5 (look it up). And that night I told God, I hear You and I am listening. I will close the doors at Wells Fargo and open them at home. I will follow You.
And so, it's official. After 8 years in the office, and 4 years working from home under my belt, August 13th, 2012 I am now a full time, stay at home wife and mother, living on faith.